Financial Settlement

[Aussie Frontier]

So am guessing there have been the odd one or 3 of us that have been faced with Financial Settlement. Whats the go with the 2 year thing. Is it a limit or you have to do it by then or what?Anyone know?


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[Dave]

Cant help mate, but good luck with it.

 

[ljacko78]

Hey Aussie

Sorry to hear mate. The only time frame I remember was with having to be separate for minimum 1 year before you could apply for divorce and financial settlement. Is that what you were referring to? I didn't have kids so mine was pretty straight forward.

Lj

 

[scottybobcat]

I don't think there is a time on settlement. It can be done straight away.Divorce is 1 year before it can take effect. I'm still waiting on my accountant to finalise everything so I can get it to the solicitor. I feel your pain mate. (and thats not the loss of the MRS.lol)

 

[Aussie Frontier]

I take it as shit happens and she wanted out so she got what she wanted. She said something about the Divorce a few months back but I havent heard squat from her since.

I think it might be she got told stuff she didnt like
Things like she still had to pay her half of the mortgage etc and all joint name bills. She was originally wanting half the value of the house and that was it. I agreed and said minus the money you havent paid etc etc etc .She didnt like that bit

might bite the bullet and go see a solicitor again next week and find out the best most painless way of settlement
Spoke to a solicitor a while ago now and he said it would pretty much just come down to the house unless she wants to get painfull and then its who earned more etc etc etc. The fact we both have cars and super etc means not really have to come into it
Dont wanna be nasty just wanna go right down whats fair but if she hooks in with a solicitor from the man haters group of the world then could be in for a fight

 

[fisher]

I'm going through this at the moment. Fortunately me and the ex have come to an agreed settlement. I think I was overly generous in some areas, but could have been screwed elsewhere. So it has probably balanced out and without agro has some benefit. We came to an agreement without solicitors - that way we (roughly) get 50% each. Once you bring lawyers into it it will go down to 33% each.
My ex and I came to our own agreement, but trying to get legal advice together was impossible. Lawyers would refuse to see us together. If we wanted advice I'd have to engage someone and the ex would have to engage someone else, and then the lawyers would go back and forth to find an agreement, costing a fortune.
If you can possibly manage to do it without the lawyers, that would be my suggestion. Good luck - its a terrible time.

 

[Aussie Frontier]

I was more wanting info from the solicitors as to what I was legally entitled to so that I was being fair and yet wasnt selling myself short

Another thing is i kept the house. She via her business paid for a double garage etc . I on the other hand put cash onto the mortgage years ago.
The info I got a while back was I didnt have the share my cash input however we were both entitled to half the house minus bills etc
Its the little stuff i need to find out about. I have been paying the mortgage alone and paid out all the joint cards. my understanding is she still has to pay her half of the mortgage payments and joint debts. She is also responsible for half of all mandatory bills like rates etc.
This is where the solicitors come in. I plan to make her an offer laying everything out and then let her decide how she wants to go. But I need to know exactly whats what and what is legal .
I dont want her coming back with some weird assed reason she doesnt have to pay anything and is entitled to everything . that sorta thing

 

[scottybobcat]

Mate once you agree to something get a solicitor to write the agreement up and you both sign it to make it legal therefore she can't come back at you for anything

 

[fisher]

Check out the family court web site - look for 'consent orders'. There are some useful documents/guides etc. A consent order is where, once you've come to an agreement, the court will give an order as to the dispersion of assets. Once the court has done that, there can be no come back for a second grab. The other thing you might want to think about is contacting 'Relationships Australia' - they offer free legal advice, mediation processes etc. Check out their web site -there are a couple of good supporting documents re separation on there as well.

 

[ljacko78]

+1 to fisher and Scotty

1 know what ur entitled to and that is likely thru a solicitor
2 if you can come to agreement outside solicitors then great. Write down what u agreed to and either use consent order or get your solicitor to write it up
3 once signed by u and her include it in the financial settlement. When that's approved she can't object down the road

Watch she doesn't try to hot you up for super annuation. My sis in law got screwed on that. As u owned the place first u will have some more entitlement to it, but she could claim maintenance and support of u and the home which does give her a percent. If you can't agree on a basic $ amount, you'll need the solicitor to work it out for you

I was able to stay civil thru mine. It's not easy but it did help. All the best mate

Lj

 

[tatty]

Whatever you do, keep clear of the lawyers and courts. It will only be lost money that neither of you see, wasted time and a much more pain stakeing process. We have to remember women are stubborn and don't know how to think clearly. If they want something, they'll just get it, despite who's in their way.
You should speak to my dad. He fought mum in the courts for 5 years without a single lawyer. He has more info about family law in his head than most barristers could recite. He poured hours and hours into the books and came out better because of it.

Best of luck.

 

[scottybobcat]

Are you going for half custody of the kids also. If you are it cuts down on child support and settlement figures. I'm not saying this to save you money as you should want to have your kids half the time

 

[Aussie Frontier]

The daughter is 18 and not going to UNI so out of the equation. the son does the week about shuffle already and have an agreement with the ex so no child support

 

[UncySpam]

give Relationships Australia a call - they offer settlement mediation.

http://www.relationships.org.au/wha...tion/family-dispute-resolution-mediation-text

 

[Aussie Frontier]

Thanks Uncyspam will give them a whirl

 

[4 naving]

Good luck Aussie... going through some tough times myself... got a littlie note on my desk that i read every day saying "laugh when you can, let go of things you can't change, LIFE is too short to be anything buy happy". Best wishes mate...

 

[siringo]

A mate has a T shirt that reads:

I got this T shirt for my wife.
It was a fair swap.

All the best for the future mate, tough times.

 

[RLI]

I am so sorry to hear that!

G, day, Aussie Frontier, Jacko 78, Fisher and Scotty Bobcat,

I am so sorry for things not working out in your respective relationships; I cannot give any advice as I have not travelled down that road and if i did would be totally hypocritical.

However, I can and will offer my friendship and support should you require it!

Regards,

RLI

 

[Gee man]

Just thought I would add my two bits worth to the conversation.

I separated from my missus of 13 years last August and have two boys 9 and 7. Under the definition of "hell hath no fury like a woman" is a picture of my ex and her female lawyer. She was a completely absent mum to the kids yet she is doing everything possible to keep them from me, destroying their mental wellbeing in the process. And she wants 65% of everything because she reckons I brought nothing financially to the relationship despite working fulltime because she was too lazy to work any more than a couple of days a week, and selling a brand new Patrol and boat to buy a house.
9 mths in and we are probably down about 35k between the two of us in legal bills with no end in sight.
For mediation and settlements to work there has to be negotiation and an agreement, and my experience is that unless the man backs down there is no agreement because they are vile evil stubborn bitches with no intention of doing the right thing for the kids. And in the eyes of the law and child support agency, if you are the dad then you are completely screwed no matter how much you have tried to do the right thing.

Apologies for the rant guys, but being in the position I am in I can only offer this advice. If you look like going down this path do absolutely everything you can to keep the communication open and keep it amicable. But, most importantly, get legal advice early, proper legal advice. Don't just go for the free advice lines and try and manage it yourself for a few months and then find out she was in the lawyers office three days after the split because it takes a lot of work to make up that ground and you will get reamed in the meantime.

 

[RLI]

Just thought I would add my two bits worth to the conversation.

I separated from my missus of 13 years last August and have two boys 9 and 7. Under the definition of "hell hath no fury like a woman" is a picture of my ex and her female lawyer. She was a completely absent mum to the kids yet she is doing everything possible to keep them from me, destroying their mental wellbeing in the process. And she wants 65% of everything because she reckons I brought nothing financially to the relationship despite working fulltime because she was too lazy to work any more than a couple of days a week, and selling a brand new Patrol and boat to buy a house.
9 mths in and we are probably down about 35k between the two of us in legal bills with no end in sight.
For mediation and settlements to work there has to be negotiation and an agreement, and my experience is that unless the man backs down there is no agreement because they are vile evil stubborn bitches with no intention of doing the right thing for the kids. And in the eyes of the law and child support agency, if you are the dad then you are completely screwed no matter how much you have tried to do the right thing.

Apologies for the rant guys, but being in the position I am in I can only offer this advice. If you look like going down this path do absolutely everything you can to keep the communication open and keep it amicable. But, most importantly, get legal advice early, proper legal advice. Don't just go for the free advice lines and try and manage it yourself for a few months and then find out she was in the lawyers office three days after the split because it takes a lot of work to make up that ground and you will get reamed in the meantime.

G,day Gee man,

Well said mate!

Regards,

RLI